Rusty

 That rusty feeling when you play a violin that was packed away for months in the generous company of thin layers of dust. 

That rusty feeling when you socialise after staying home too long or when you go for a walk after resting a fractured limb for months. 

I feel that rustiness now writing here again. It has been so long that I have mixed feelings about it. A break is good but the rust part is inevitably true. And to overcome that rust you gotta move through it. This is a piece I offer in attempt to move past that rustiness, hoping to find some clarity and relief.

Everytime I find myself drowning in self- contradiction, thinking of the ocean gives me peace. 

Look at those waves. They belong to the same water body. They fearlessly move forward and take up space as they need. They then leave with no hesitation as their limit breaches past their capacity. 

Waves appearing from multitudes of angles of various size and density, hold space for each other without comparing or competing but by being aware of their individual strengths and limitations and move accordingly.

So yes, my thoughts may not be aligned in the exact same way but I cannot let that push me into stagnancy. To show up and reach for the stars, knowing that I can always take a step back when needed. To explore and make mistakes and to keep learning from them again and again. 

Here's to a new chapter of which the size and content is yet to unfold!

(Back after a lovely 4 month break off social media)

9th January,  2022